Whilst we think about teenagers as reaching a point in their lives where they want to be away from the family unit, and spending their time socialising and interacting with their friends in the outside world, the reality is that this is happening less frequently than the media might have us believe. For those of us graced with young people who are committed to doing well in their education and involving themselves as much as possible in their academic lives to increase their chances of a more prosperous future, these are the young people who are most likely to spend their teenage years inside instead of outside.

From the age of eleven, all the way until leaving education, most teenagers are bombarded with homework, revision and exams. Should they be the sort who are committed to doing the best that they can, then they may find themselves locked away and somewhat isolated from the social skills that are just as important for them to develop at this time. There are countless benefits that are clear and obvious when it comes to young people devoting themselves to their education and whilst this is to be encouraged by both school and parents, it is always worth considering getting the balance right. By balance I’m talking about not doing too much of any one thing, in the same way that in order to live a healthy lifestyle, you cannot spend your life eating healthy foods but from time to time you should treat yourself some chocolate cake or a treat. A person who is entirely devoted to exercise can run their body down and wear out their joints, causing them problems in their older age.

In just the same way, focusing entirely on developing academic attributes without considering the social impact that this can have will do a disservice to important areas of development in your teenage child. It’s important to get the balance right. They shouldn’t just be let out occasionally to spend time with friends but it should be in fact encouraged. Developing the skills to ask for a ticket in the cinema or to pay for food, or to order off of a menu, are all important life skills that will serve them greatly in their future. Our school system at times seems favoured in creating young people who are masterminds when it comes to academia, yet who lack the social-emotional and inter skills required to function as adults in later life. In my work as a therapist, I offer sessions to children, parents and teenagers.

If you are concerned that your teenage child is lacking some of the skills required that will help them to become confident and independent young adults, then it is worth considering a free consultation with me at my therapy practice in Essex. Here I can establish whether your young person needs some assistance in overcoming issues such as anxiety or developing their self-esteem before they are able to juggle this new aspect of human interaction; or whether it would be more beneficial to work with you as a parent around how to improve your interaction with them, encouraging them to leave the bedroom or the PS4. If you would like to book in a free consultation, then please call my assistant Olivia on 07958 203 274. Alternatively, you can email me and be booked in from there.